Beware of Cupid's Arrow in the Workplace
February 17th 2008 04:33
About a third of U.S. workers have said they would consider having a workplace romance, a number that has steadily declined from 42 percent three years ago, according to a recent survey by recruiting and staffing company Spherion Corp.
The poll found that 30 percent were hesitant to date a co-worker for fear it would jeopardize their job security or advancement opportunities, and about a third of those who reported having an office fling said they kept it a secret. Women were more likely to keep their romances under wraps -- 35 percent compared with 25 percent of men.
Meanwhile, nearly 60 percent reported that their company does not have a policy on relationships in the workplace. About a third of U.S. workers have said they would consider having a workplace romance, a number that has steadily declined from 42 percent three years ago, according to a recent survey by recruiting and staffing company Spherion Corp.
Career Builder and Harris Polls found that 40 percent) workers say they have dated a co-worker at sometime during their careers, with 20 percent admitting to doing it more than twice, according to CareerBuilder.com's annual office romance survey of more than 6,700 workers. Close to three-in-ten (29 percent) workers said they went on to marry the person they dated at work.
Comparing age groups, workers aged 55 and older were least likely (34 percent) to say they have dated a co-worker during their careers, while 44 percent of workers aged 35-44 were the most likely to have done so.
Workers aren't just interested in dating their peers. Twenty-seven percent of workers admit they have dated someone with a higher position in their organization; female workers more so than males, at 37 percent and 20 percent, respectively. Ninety-eight percent of workers said their relationship with someone at work did nothing to progress their career.
Romance between co-workers rarely begins in the actual office, with 13 percent of workers saying their relationships began when they ran into each other outside of work. Other situations where office romances found their spark included:
-- Happy hour (11 percent)
-- At lunch (11 percent)
-- Working after-hours together (10 percent)
-- Love at first sight (10 percent)
-- Company office party (2 percent)
These points are critical, especially for those of you who are trying to advance your career in a small office environment.
Size matters: A small to medium size office can be a potentially disastrous place to find oneself attracted to a female colleague. While falling for a co-worker is not necessarily advised in any office environment, this holds especially true in a small workplace where everyone is into everyone else’s business, both personal and work-related.
While larger offices are generally more impersonal, smaller work environments tend to create the type of closeness that can lead to the development of a romantic relationship.
The conditions are ripe for lust: When getting involved with a co-worker, chances are that you can bypass all the intricate steps that are required to attract and impress her from the beginning. You are already in direct contact with her on a daily basis, you talk about life and work, you have coffee and perhaps the occasional lunch, and it’s almost as if the early stages of the dating game have already been taken care of.
The benefits?: As with most new relationships, the real excitement comes in the early stages: the flirting, the secret emails, the smiles and sexual glances, the playful jokes and letters. These are all bonuses that will most definitely bring joy to your long, hard day at the office. Maybe you feel vitalized when you wake up in the morning and you can’t wait to see her all decked out in her office attire, complete with that cheery smile when she sees you walk in. Maybe you get to have lunch together. An otherwise boring office lunch can magically turn into an intimate lunch date complete with flirting. During private time, you will always have something to talk about when your conversation becomes stale, as you both live and breathe 40 hours of the same work space each and every week. You always have someone to confide in concerning your work-related problems. Likewise, you can be there for her when she needs to blow off some steam.
The downsides: As with everything in life, along with the good comes the bad. The only difference in this case is that when it’s bad, it’s horrible. When things are not going your way at work, the last thing you need is added pressure stemming from tension between you and your office flame. That cold, hard glare she lets off can really burn a hole right through the back of your brain when tension arises. Even worse is when others around the office have to witness this chaos. The more private time you spend together during office hours, the more you will begin to alienate yourself from your other colleagues. As soon as trouble in corporate paradise rears its ugly head and you find yourself as the office outsider, you will have to work overtime to regain their trust and friendship. When the going gets tough, it’s difficult to avoid one another in a small office. Chances are your office space or work station is just around the corner from hers, so attempting to ignore her all week is virtually impossible. In a larger office, you may be able to pull it off.
The break-up: As with many relationships, you may find that this one is not working out. If you decide that it’s time to call it off, those 40 work hours per week might feel like an eternity in the early stages of the break-up. The beauty of breaking off a normal relationship is that you no longer have to see the other person afterwards. Obviously, the same rules don’t apply when it comes to an office fling. If you are responsible for ending it, she might seek revenge and try to make your life hell at work. On the other hand, if she ends it, you could be the bitter one and you might attempt to seek revenge. What’s worse is jealousy may take its toll when you witness her flirting with other employees, going out on lunch dates and ultimately moving on with her life. Such distractions can seriously harm your performance at work.
Make a professional decision
So there you have it. If you ever find yourself in this type of predicament, do whatever you feel is right, but let your brain weigh the pros and cons before enrolling yourself in a crash course in career chaos.
The poll found that 30 percent were hesitant to date a co-worker for fear it would jeopardize their job security or advancement opportunities, and about a third of those who reported having an office fling said they kept it a secret. Women were more likely to keep their romances under wraps -- 35 percent compared with 25 percent of men.
Meanwhile, nearly 60 percent reported that their company does not have a policy on relationships in the workplace. About a third of U.S. workers have said they would consider having a workplace romance, a number that has steadily declined from 42 percent three years ago, according to a recent survey by recruiting and staffing company Spherion Corp.
Career Builder and Harris Polls found that 40 percent) workers say they have dated a co-worker at sometime during their careers, with 20 percent admitting to doing it more than twice, according to CareerBuilder.com's annual office romance survey of more than 6,700 workers. Close to three-in-ten (29 percent) workers said they went on to marry the person they dated at work.
Comparing age groups, workers aged 55 and older were least likely (34 percent) to say they have dated a co-worker during their careers, while 44 percent of workers aged 35-44 were the most likely to have done so.
Workers aren't just interested in dating their peers. Twenty-seven percent of workers admit they have dated someone with a higher position in their organization; female workers more so than males, at 37 percent and 20 percent, respectively. Ninety-eight percent of workers said their relationship with someone at work did nothing to progress their career.
Romance between co-workers rarely begins in the actual office, with 13 percent of workers saying their relationships began when they ran into each other outside of work. Other situations where office romances found their spark included:
-- Happy hour (11 percent)
-- At lunch (11 percent)
-- Working after-hours together (10 percent)
-- Love at first sight (10 percent)
-- Company office party (2 percent)
These points are critical, especially for those of you who are trying to advance your career in a small office environment.
Size matters: A small to medium size office can be a potentially disastrous place to find oneself attracted to a female colleague. While falling for a co-worker is not necessarily advised in any office environment, this holds especially true in a small workplace where everyone is into everyone else’s business, both personal and work-related.
While larger offices are generally more impersonal, smaller work environments tend to create the type of closeness that can lead to the development of a romantic relationship.
The conditions are ripe for lust: When getting involved with a co-worker, chances are that you can bypass all the intricate steps that are required to attract and impress her from the beginning. You are already in direct contact with her on a daily basis, you talk about life and work, you have coffee and perhaps the occasional lunch, and it’s almost as if the early stages of the dating game have already been taken care of.
The benefits?: As with most new relationships, the real excitement comes in the early stages: the flirting, the secret emails, the smiles and sexual glances, the playful jokes and letters. These are all bonuses that will most definitely bring joy to your long, hard day at the office. Maybe you feel vitalized when you wake up in the morning and you can’t wait to see her all decked out in her office attire, complete with that cheery smile when she sees you walk in. Maybe you get to have lunch together. An otherwise boring office lunch can magically turn into an intimate lunch date complete with flirting. During private time, you will always have something to talk about when your conversation becomes stale, as you both live and breathe 40 hours of the same work space each and every week. You always have someone to confide in concerning your work-related problems. Likewise, you can be there for her when she needs to blow off some steam.
The downsides: As with everything in life, along with the good comes the bad. The only difference in this case is that when it’s bad, it’s horrible. When things are not going your way at work, the last thing you need is added pressure stemming from tension between you and your office flame. That cold, hard glare she lets off can really burn a hole right through the back of your brain when tension arises. Even worse is when others around the office have to witness this chaos. The more private time you spend together during office hours, the more you will begin to alienate yourself from your other colleagues. As soon as trouble in corporate paradise rears its ugly head and you find yourself as the office outsider, you will have to work overtime to regain their trust and friendship. When the going gets tough, it’s difficult to avoid one another in a small office. Chances are your office space or work station is just around the corner from hers, so attempting to ignore her all week is virtually impossible. In a larger office, you may be able to pull it off.
The break-up: As with many relationships, you may find that this one is not working out. If you decide that it’s time to call it off, those 40 work hours per week might feel like an eternity in the early stages of the break-up. The beauty of breaking off a normal relationship is that you no longer have to see the other person afterwards. Obviously, the same rules don’t apply when it comes to an office fling. If you are responsible for ending it, she might seek revenge and try to make your life hell at work. On the other hand, if she ends it, you could be the bitter one and you might attempt to seek revenge. What’s worse is jealousy may take its toll when you witness her flirting with other employees, going out on lunch dates and ultimately moving on with her life. Such distractions can seriously harm your performance at work.
Make a professional decision
So there you have it. If you ever find yourself in this type of predicament, do whatever you feel is right, but let your brain weigh the pros and cons before enrolling yourself in a crash course in career chaos.
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Comment by katyzzz
Photography Tips
MS Paint Art
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feelings
Comment by Miswanderlust
Killer Beats
Ramble On
Hipnotherapy
I think that the line in the queue might be a long one !!!! HEE HEE
Comment by Miswanderlust
Killer Beats
Ramble On
Hipnotherapy
Good luck and best wishes in this new "endeavor"
Mis